Recent Movie Reviews


Avengers: Hulk Avengers: Hulk

Rated 5 / 5 stars

I will think of this submission every time I eat a pickle from now on. I will savor them.


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Ultimate VideoGame Battle Ultimate VideoGame Battle

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Couldn't agree more.

I was pretty angry at first, sitting through what a clock called "the greatest video game movie ever!" and seeing some real shit on the screen... but then you got to your ending, and your point. And you're so right.

It seems every time I submit any of my games one (or two) of these crappy sprite movies (not much better than this one) is submitted the same day, and snags the top or top two spots, giving my game a third place and most likely meaning it gets ignored, because as long as you have a video game character in your movie, you automatically get a 4.0+ rating on this site.

Where did all these obsessed video game freaks with no taste come from? Look, I love those games too, I grew up with them, but that doesn't mean I automatically hump anything that has my favorite video game characters' faces on them. Aren't you guys the same people who rip on how terrible all these video game-based movies in Hollywood are? Those, at least, had a score of people spending a lot of time and effort on them. These sprite movies DON'T.

It'd be one thing if they managed to be witty or clever or satirical, but they all have silly stupid slapstick humor, or have them "dance" to crappy pop music, because you can't do too much with the sprite set for a character meant for video games (run, jump, fly, and fight, that's just about it).

So congrats on expressing what the quiet minority has been thinking. Maybe the right people will get the message and knock it off, or stop voting this shit up to first place all the time.


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F00D responds:

good lord this was a brilliant review, you've captured my thoughts exactly :')


Dumbass Mario Dumbass Mario

Rated 1.5 / 5 stars

Ugh...

...this was pretty horrible. I can respect the time you took to make the animation, but the humor just wasn't there, or perhaps just not my kind of humor. I really felt like my 5 minutes was wasted after watching that, and felt pretty angry that it was spent watching this.

It probably doesn't help that I'm tired of all these stupid sprite movies to begin with, though, and how they always seem win the Daily Feature and get front page, regardless of how good they are.


Recent Game Reviews


Rings and Sticks Rings and Sticks

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Unconventional math made into a fun game?!?

Wow. I never would have even considered tapping into binary trees for anything other than searches for word games. Here I am looking at all other aspects of game design to try to come up with some compelling and unique idea (compared to the usual "take this format and tweak it slightly" most web game devs are taking nowadays, that even I kinda got sucked into), and here you are and find something in math that hasn't already been used in tons of video games out there (physics, particle motion, magnetism, orbits, etc) and turn it into a unique and challenging puzzle game. Huh.

Seriously, I haven't seen a game so different on this site since... well, I guess since your Blockhead game, but those have been the only two in a good year or two, at least. Even triachnid was just "ragdoll physics with drag and drop sticky legs"


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Komix responds:

Thanks. I was thinking of a good game for the JiG contest (with the theme grow) in a half hour the idea completly developed as it is now. I did the game graphics and script in less then a week. the only problem was making up good levels.

I sure liek how it turned out :-D

I liked Proximity btw
-Komix

Let creativity take control


3rd World Farmer 3rd World Farmer

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Needless drag and drop got really annoying.

I don't understand why I needed to drag and drop each item onto a square on the board when it didn't make any difference where it was on the board. I should just have to click on the icons and they pop up on the nearest available spot on the board. And if they accidentally misclick once in awhile, offer an 'undo' button. That way over the long term, you're saving people a loooot of extra strain on their mouse hand while playing your game, strain that isn't necessary in the first place. It also saves time and the ocassional annoying stopDrag() that's off by a couple pixels thus counting as a cancelled action.

Personally, that really interfered with my enjoyment of the game.

Everything else, though, looked pretty good, and the concept was interesting, although it didn't look like there was any real way you would ever be completely wiped out if you diversified, but maybe I just didn't get that far yet.


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Pandemic: EoM Pandemic: EoM

Rated 2 / 5 stars

Proof that game developers shouldn't rush sequels.

I've had the sequel to my Proximity game in the works for over a year now, after yet another year of sitting on the idea and letting it percolate in my mind on what could make the game a better experience. I have actually waited too long, as people are starting to forget the original game.

However, making (and releasing!) a sequel only a month after the original obviously is too short of a time to wait. This game suffered from fuzzy graphics, making things more complicated for the sake of being more complication than actually adding a better game experience, making things even more reliant on chance, and a modified GUI that obstructs part of the playing field. Letting this game sit for a little while and taking a look at it every day without actually doing anything to it before releasing it would have revealed that these are obvious problems interfering with people's enjoyment of the game.

I highly suggest to the game author to have more than one series in the works, so that he can alternate between them (and ocassionally add a new series) before working on the sequels to one of his earlier games, that way his mind can work subconsciously on the problem of what needs to be done to improve the game instead of just immediately latching on to whatever suggestion sounded appealling in the reviews left on the previous game.

The demand for the game will still be there after the wait, and you'll still get a good amount of sponsorship money (if that's what you're worried about) once you actually get around to making the game. In fact, you might even get more money for the game, and you don't risk ruining the reputation the series has made in the process.

Two years can be too long in the web game world (although not necessarily). Nine months is probably a good time to wait, though, and get it out after a year. Just imagine, if you put out a sequel to this game year after year, every year, the game would end up having about 20 more sequels than even the most prolific commercial game series get. You don't need to rush yourself that much.


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Recent Audio Reviews


StringMix StringMix

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Awesome...

Awesome song... even if you aren't responsible for making most of it, you're still responsible for me getting to hear it. Although I can't determine if the previous reviewer's accusations are true or not, since I can't find the original anywhere, or even a mention of the band.



mosh moshi qeshi! mosh moshi qeshi!

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars

Nice!

Very light, airy, laid back, spacey tune. I like.


qeshi responds:

thanx m8!

you could download a better version of the track here:
http://www.qeshi.com/moshi.mp3
or download some more of my music here
http://www.qeshi.com/